Unclog the Pipes to Feel Lighter
/Resolve things fully to make space for what matters.
Yes I did create this image with AI - and yes I did leave the frame quote as is for this newsletter. And yes I did find it soothing to have a grandma clear the pipes.
TLDR: If you have a recurring issue that just won't get solved, this is for you. See where you're avoiding something, or only facing it halfway. What would it look like (and feel like) if it was 100% resolved?
I've been thinking about plumbing lately (you too, I presume.) 🪠
For one, I decided to fix my toilet by replacing the flapper instead of telling my landlord. I am quite proud of myself.
The other reason is much more metaphorical.
About a month ago, I got VERY frustrated that I had so many things on my mind that just weren't. ever. getting. solved.
Recurring things that would come up over and over again in my to do list, in conversations, or in my ruminating thoughts. Never fully solved.
I would make some progress and I felt busy, but things weren't coming off my plate.
For me, that looked like:
My knee pain flaring up again - doing 1x PT session and then nothing
Feeling tension with a friend but avoiding the conversation
Wanting less backend work in my business, but spinning my wheels
Not sleeping enough and doing little about it
And a few more big and little annoyances
For my clients, it's recently been...
Holding back on firing an associate and just dealing with issues weekly
Having the same disagreement with colleagues over and over again
Missing a key skill at work and just feeling imposter syndrome
Working for a not-great boss and not seeing a path out that feels ok
I view all of these as clogs in the pipes, bogging my system down.
They weigh on me. They drain my energy. Limit my ability to focus on other things. They're distracting and take up brain space and emotional energy.
There are definitely valid reasons why some things stayed clogged. But when I finally want to actually solve something, I haven't been doing it.
What if they were fully unclogged?
Half clearing the clogs.
My default M.O. can often be to take a small action, then move on:
Do some PT exercises vs. actually getting on a program for a month. Talk through my worries in therapy, but not have the conversation. Research how to open an HSA, but then push back the task week after week.
Or for my clients, they'll start planning how to hire around a bad performer vs. imagining an org that was humming with the right people in the right seats. They'll have a few exploratory conversations to see what other jobs are out there or take a job that's offered to them because it's there, vs. taking stock of what they really want and intentionally going out to find it.
Taking a small action is great! But is it actually clearing the clog? For me, the answer was usually no.
When I do this default 1/2 clearing, I equate it to clearing the gutters of a house. Instead of finishing one at a time, I'll take a few leaves out of one, move to the next, go around the back, then go get a snack and watch TV. Then be annoyed the gutters aren't cleared. No bueno.
Clearing the clog completely.
With some inspiration from a few people in my life who are excellent at fully clearing clogs, I've been changing my M.O. Instead of chipping away at things one at a time, I now view myself as the head of the factory.
I'm taking a step back to look at the system as a whole, seeing what's clogged, and putting things in place to fully solve them. I've outlined many of the clogs on a piece of paper, and I'm working to clear them in the next few weeks before my vacation (or at least put them on a path to clearing). It's my spring cleaning!
What would it look like if all of this was cleared?
What if my knee pain was gone and I could do all the volleyball, tennis, hikes, etc. that I wanted?
What if I could have so much love, connection and fun with my friend?
What if my business was humming and I could spend more time on my favorite parts of my job or something else like my hobbies?
It would feel so much lighter!
For my clients, they usually find...
They stop dreading interactions and finally feel like they have someone they can rely on
They regain their confidence and feel on track for promotion
They find a job they're genuinely super excited about, that pays them all the money they need, and gives them the lifestyle they want.
They also feel lighter. More confident. More excited and joyful. More present with family and friends. Healthier.
The 5-minute unclogging exercise.
Want to try it yourself? Here's a quick exercise to get started.
Take a step back from your life. What's been weighing you down? Jot them all down on a piece of paper. (Getting them out of your brain is already half the battle.)
Pick one that feels especially frustrating.
Close your eyes and visualize: imagine it's 6 months from now. What would it look like if this were completely resolved? How would you feel instead? What would your work and life look like day-to-day?
What would help you fully unclog it? Maybe it's blocking time on your calendar, asking someone for help, or getting external accountability. Or clearing another clog first so you have more bandwidth.
What could you do to prevent this from clogging up again?
If you have more than 5 minutes, create your own Clog Log! (oh my). A visual grid of the recurring things you finally want off your plate. Then systematically solve them completely and reward yourself when done.
Interested in coaching? Schedule a free brain dump coaching call. Just want to catch up? Email me or find time to connect.
Sign-up for my newsletter to get updates on more tools and metaphors, client stories, and coaching updates.